5 Things That Piss Me Off (part 1)

1) I hate when I'm in the grocery store & I'm in a hurry & they only got one fuckin checker & the bitch be going mad slow next thing you know her register broke or something. smh. I'm Standing there like "BITCH are you shitting me!? I got somewhere to be in 10mins and yo ass wanna go and break the register." Where the fuck is all the other cashiers? This broad aint got no co-workers? The fuck?!! its a line all the way to the back of the frozen food aisle cause it's one got damn cashier & this incompetent ass bitch wanna fuck up the register. Thats when I walk the fuck out with my groceries like Bitch i'll be back to pay for this shit later my kids hungry as fuck. Shit what she gone do call security? PLEASE! I shop in that store every damn day, she know I'ma pay her later.

2) I hate when I be at the Doc's office or somewhere and It's a kid sitting in front of me who keep turning around to eyeball me. & The mama dont never slap the kid or nothing to say "stop fucking staring at that black bitch" whats worse the kid wanna stick out they tongue or something rude & you gotta clench your fist up tight to keep from punching the kid in his face. Like really though pay attention to what the fuck yo child is doing. There aint no excuse for lil "rachel" to be sitting there making evil faces at me then run her finger across her neck like "you're dead" OH REALLY!? Wait till yo mama not looking you little brat I'ma slap the shit out of you with a Dr. Seuss book. =( STOP FUCKING STARING AT ME!!!

3) I hate how the nigga from the "Everest" commercial think he know exactly what the fuck we doing. "you spend all day on the phone anyway...why not make the call" well first of all nigga how you know what the fuck I be doinh? I dont even got a phone. Here his black ass is all on t.v. tryna be a career advisor & shit & how much you wanna bet his ass aint even go to that damn school. They probablly paid the nigga 50$, an pound of kush & a bottle of "Hen" to do that damn commercial. Tryna look all successful and shit. I know that nigga aint go to no damn college, he one of the dope boys standing on somebody block with a lil 45' underneath his "Everest" T-shirt. I'm just telling you what I know man.

4) I hate how everybody and they mama wanna ask you for a ride just cause you got a car! But let that muthufuka break down & guess what...dont nobody know yo ass anymore. Niggas be asking to kick it with you just cause they know you got a car. Oh yeah they yo best fucking friend. But Soon as that bitch break down...where they at? I'ma start charging 50$ per ride, I dont give a damn if you just tryna go 2 blocks. It's 10$ for gas & 40$ for life insurance. Cause I'm taking a big risk just chaperoning your ass all around town, something could happen to me on the way & I need my dividends. So if you aint tryna pay up...guess you better put ya roller skates on buddy.

5)I hate when a dude tryna talk to you and he say "I'm just tryna be yo friend shawty" Or when you say "I got a man" & he say "well yo man dont allow you to have friends" FRIENDS?!! Nigga shut the fuck up! Do you usually look your friends up and down while licking your lips? you been staring at my ass for the last 5mins & you talking about some friends! Yeah friends with benefits. You aint slick. I mean thats the funny thing about you dudes...tryna be slick...but yo game is so so DEAD. I cant do nothing but laugh. Oh boy dont let you turn his ass down cause now he going off talking bout "how you wasnt even that cute anyway" NIGGA PLEASE. I AM THAT CUTE...thats why you so mad. ol'' thirsty ass. STOP IT.

Man I would go on & on...But I got shit to do...Dont worry it's plenty more where this came from just not today.

I Speak Out About Domestic Violence

4 LOKOS aka Liquid Crack

First of all Ima sue the fuck outta 4Lokos they never told nobody the after effects.of this shit. I wake up from a coma & shit. My eyelids glued shut from my smeared mascara, clothes all wrinkled, I mean I looked like somebody just ran me over with a tractor, then stuck me in a dryer for 35 min on high heat. The thing that pisses me off the most is EVERYTIME I drink this liquid cocaine I say the next morning "Maaaan I'm never drinking 4 Lokos AGAIN. Then for some reason I turn right back around & drink it again. And the sad thing is...its always one can and I'm wasted. Cmon SON really? I cant for the life of me understand how one human being can drink 15 shots of patron & be a little drunk, but one can of 4 Lokos & straight GONE. And the things...oh lordy...the THINGS IT MAKES YOU DO! I'm convinced they are spiking these cans with doses of ecstacy or something. I'm not playin. If you could just know how ignorant I get when I got this mess in my system. I'm ready to fight, fuck, & cuddle all at the same time. SMH. Who does that?!!! I'm not gone lie lastnight I made out with somebodies girlfriend, the night before somebody gave me a hicky, the night before that....WELL...*ahem* we wont talk about THAT NIGHT! I mean come on now its the past no need bringin up old shit right?! HA. All I can say is SLUTVILLE.com smh One big hot mess is what it is. And tell me why I wake up this morning...its two girls laying next to me on a twin mattress...ok it could be a little mini queen size bed but the point is the damn thing seemed extra small waking up with somebodys foot jammed in your ribs & the other girl crushed up against the wall. sheesh. So I notice my foot feels damp...come to find out, the girl next to me done pissed all in the bed!! SMH REALLY!? WTF. how old are you Bitch? Why is there a wet spot the size of china at the bottom of the bed. What kills me the most is the broad woke her pissy ass up & aint even try to take a shower! hmph. I aint gone blame that on the 4 Lokos i'm gone just assume the bitch got a very weak bladder. If thats the case I would totally appreciate a memo or something! Like seriously, let me know you pee in the bed so I can make other sleeping arrangements. I mean, I started to buy the little pissy girl a bag of depends, like "Here next time you get drunk throw one of these on!" smh. The moral to this story? First of all STAY AWAY FROM THAT LIQUID CRACK! It's poison. Toxic. Addictive. Whoever invented the shit should be shot! Even so my dumb ass cant stop drinking it. Especially the cranberry lemonade. BOMB. Second of all make sure you know who you falling asleep next to...YOU COULD BE THE NEXT ONE WAKING UP IN A WET SPOT!!!!

The Girl Formerly Known As 'The Blonde Vixxxen'

As many of you may have noticed...I disappeared off the face of the earth for a while. I took my backpack, & flashlight & some gum for my bad morning breath & just left. A hiatus from the entire social world!  Did a little reflecting, made a few changes in attempts to better myself. Not saying that I succeeded. Actually I highly doubt that I did, but just play along with me and pretend to be supportive of the new me, OK? Thanks. So you may have also noticed I deleted my twitter @TheBlondVixxxen does not exist anymore!!!      =,(  I know, I know...how devastating! No more roasting, & bullying people on the internet! SIIIIIIIKE. That my Loves is why I am here, returning with my blog so that I can hurt peoples feelings in the privacy of my own world. =) No one to block me or report me to the twitter police. HA! Every week I'll find a new deserving victim to pick on...just cause I can! Dont worry...I'll still be posting my "disaster dates" & other rants and raves. And by the way I am still on twitter, however I only use the page for promotional/networking purposes. @RHCs_QueenB. Like before I'll try to have a post atleast twice a week...So fasten your seatbelts...We're back in the fast lane again!!!