Ladies Night Out

So lastnight was my first time going to a club in a while, and I must say I definitely had a memorable night! From the drunk white girls booty poppin and grinding on me to the "straight" guy who dry humped me till he had a seizure in desperate efforts to prove he is not gay! LMAO. The thing is, there is nothing you can do to convince me you are not gay when your hair is practically super glued to the side of your face with gel, your skinny jeans so snug I can see the imprint of your balls, and your hand looks permanently broke. GAY GAY GAY! Despite my efforts to convince him that his "undercover" sexuality was something that I was comfortable with he failed to come to terms with his love for "meat" and insisted the whole night how straight he was, and how much he loved pussy. Anyway, he was indeed the highlight of my night. The majority of my night consisted of me downing whatever alcoholic beverages had the quickest effect on me. I danced with random white girls, bending em' over on the dance floor, while I groped them. I took down numbers, and flirted with the bartender. By the end of the night I was definitely the life of the party, successfully winning over damn near everyone in the club with my charisma and wacky personality. We exited the first club a couple hours before closing to make our appearance at a majorly stale strip club where the females were a little too washed up for my liking. But I still got the spot poppin, threw a few dollars at the most decent looking stripper in the spot and engaging in a little meaningless fondling with my right hand girl. All eyes were definitely on us lastnight! From head to toe we looked amazingly perfect. And I definitely look forward to doing it all again soon. Besides whats a party without "The Blonde Vixxxen" right?